Merry Christmas!

Have a wonderful holiday....

The Road

I finished “The Road” by Cormac McCarthy last night. I’ve cried while reading books before, but this book totally ripped my heart out. It’s the story of a man and his son in the wake of a burned out and totally ashen world. A sun that scarcely filters through the ashy clouds. Dead, mummified remains everywhere. Food and water scant after years of scavenging. But a love so simple and true that takes your breath away. A good book is one that pulls you in and doesn’t let go…this one yanks you down and puts you in a vice grip. I could NOT put it down. Harsh yet tender. Desperate yet hopeful. Beautifully sad and ugly. There are so many juxtapositions. You want it to end, but you don’t want it to be over. Though it is a very quick read.
Were it not, you may drown in the ashes yourself.

Zzzzzzzzzz

I would never make it on a reality show. Not because I absolutely hate being in front of a camera (I do), or having to spend time with a bunch of hammy a-holes instead of my family (picture: hell), but because they would deprive me of my precious sleep to evoke an emotional outburst for the camera. And they would sooo get it from me. One night with little sleep is enough to affect me on many levels. My body aches, my hair hurts, my eyes feel gritty, the bags under my eyes threaten to open up shop; I am edgy and jittery. My thoughts are cloudy. I don’t know how people do it. In my younger days I could roll with it easily for several days in a row. Nowadays I am like a cranky old woman without my beauty rest. No, not LIKE a cranky old woman…I AM a cranky old woman. Reality tv would have a heyday with me. I would be the bitch, the sap, the complainer (I am pretty good so far today), the accuser, and the crier all rolled into one. Yep, they would LOVE me.
But, you know what tomorrow is? Saturday. Sleep-day. Snuggle-day. Comforter-day.
Heaven-day.

10 Things

I finally have some pictures from the birthday blowout. The scary balloon pic is there, along with a cute one of HP and Grammy. And yes, I included a pic of half eaten cake, but I had to show that cute soap bar I made of white chocolate. I am also proud of the banner I made over her highchair. That will be a birthday tradition for HP now - breaking the banner out a day or two before her birthday. I can’t wait until she is old enough for us to do crafty stuff like that together…making holiday decorations, painting pictures and baking cookies. I am such a dork about things like that. I just made a big card wreath that got hung over our mantle last night. I am now onto sewing our stockings.
Now onto the important stuff….
10 Little Known Facts About Hattie Pearl
1. She has small feet
2. Favorite foods: broccoli, steak, sticky rice, plain yogurt. She’s not big on fruit, but loves most all veggies.
3. She is beginning to take steps unassisted or encouraged
4. She loves all things “socks”
5. Her first word was “Dada”. She will also now “woof’ for a doggie.
6. When topless she pats her tummy, which is about the cutest thing ever
7. She (now) likes her jogging stroller and long walks in it
8. Standing at the family room window is one of her favorite pastimes
9. She loves to sleep and usually smiles when you lay her in her crib for the night
10. When tired, Hattie puts her tongue to the front of her mouth and raises her arm so she is almost licking her forearm. It is her special form of thumb-sucking.

Birthday

My little girl is one year old today. It blows my mind. In some ways, it seems like yesterday she arrived, all beautiful and tiny. In other ways, its as if I've always known her and we've never been apart. She takes up such a huge space in my life and an even bigger space in my heart. Hattie, you are my light and I love you more than you will ever know. Happy Birthday, Dear One.
Mama

Lions, Tigers and Balloons, Oh My!

Yesterday was Hattie’s big first birthday bash. We had a rubber ducky theme and I went all out with decorations. I bought about 20 little ducks on-line and had them floating in glass bowls filled with blue water. I bought a dozen blue and white balloons (we’ll get to those later). I made ducky cupcakes for the kids, blue ‘pond water’ punch (with more ducks) and a big cake with blue frosting, bubbles and a bar of 'soap' on top. It all came out pretty cute. I forgot, of course, to take pictures of it all until after the party. Tomorrow I can post a pic of the half-eaten cake. I really wish I was better at taking pictures. I seem to miss all the good shots and get closed-eyes and blurry aftermath most of the time. But I digress… The party was a great time – HP was a wonderful hostess, gladly being passed from family member to family member and putting on a show of her greatest hits – hand clapping, nose scrunching, jabbering, and demonstrating ‘so big’ for the audience. I think they will be back for the show next year.
So, back to the balloons….
The party started at 1:00. I had gone and picked up the balloons while HP was down for her morning nap. They were in groups around the house when she came downstairs to eat lunch. Well, she flipped out in her high-chair and I could not figure out what was wrong. It was the balloons. When they moved they freaked her out. She would grip the hell out of me whenever we passed by them. All day she kept her eyes on them if there were any in the same room as her. I had my Dad take pictures when Bri, Hattie and I opened her gifts. In the first half of the pics she is smiling and checking out her new things. Then comes a gift bag with a balloon on top. Aaaaa! Damn menacing balloon. Floating, lurking, waiting to get her... So, the rest of the pics she is wide-eyed, staring at that floating evilness making sure it doesn’t attack her. The pics reveal it all – the rest of the party goers are completely oblivious to this lurking danger, but HP knows better. She saved us all.
Needless to say, every kid at the party got to take a balloon home with them. The leftovers my nephew set free into the sky. Hattie watched. It was a very cathartic experience for her, watching the evil in her life drift off into the big blue sky…

Smack-talkin

There are two people in my life that I idolize for their ability to be nice no matter what. My brother and my friend Wick. They are extraordinary at being kind to everyone and never gossiping. Never. When I say anything negative to my brother, he just smiles and listens but never adds comments or fuel to the fire. And he does it with such ease, in no way getting sucked into the negativity. I went to high school with Wick and she, for all four years, never said one unkind thing about anyone we knew. And we knew some real a-holes. She was loved by everyone and made me want to get on that bandwagon and join her, but I never quite made it. My life has been a series of jumping on, falling back off and running to get back on. Most days I am still running for it, only to let my big mouth get in the way and eat dust behind the wagon again. There are people that I want to scream at, or to anyone who will listen about how much I dislike them. Right now I am listening to a lady at work that makes me wants to pull my hair out and commit hari-kari. Why do I need to let anyone know I don’t like her? What do they care? What good will it do me to say it? My attitude needs to improve. I want to take the high road on the wagon, I really do, but the world is full of a*holes and I feel the need to be in the front of the pack pointing out which ones are. Starting today, I am making a commitment to kindness, positivity and compassion. It is going to be a struggle, it always has been, but I am now going to make a concerted effort to be better. Now, if you hear me talking smack you have my permission to call me an a*hole.
I told you the world was full of ‘em.

Future Blackmail

"I think we got the best one"

Does every parent think they have the best kid? Because if they do, they’re all wrong. We do. Hattie Pearl has been so much fun lately. She is becoming more her own little person every day and I must say I love what she is becoming. She has always been an extremely mellow child, pretty content with whatever is happening, a great sleeper, a good eater, and lately her comedic side is really emerging. She cracks me up all the time. She is pointing and “oohing’ at everything. She loves to play peek-a-boo and will laugh like crazy if you act silly. She also does silly things for a laugh. Its amazing to me that kids know silly and embarrassment at such a young age. How do they know? Is silliness a genetic trait? Do you inherit your ancestors’ embarrassment gene? Crazy.
Anyhow, she is beginning to stand unassisted for brief periods now, and will take a wobbly step or two unaided. Brian and I predict her walking right around her first birthday next month. I can’t believe we are already getting to a year. Man, its flown by…
Other things she’s been working on lately include Eskimo kisses, waving, and driving, as seen here.

Are those the prettiest blue eyes you've ever seen?!?

Wilco

We attended the Wilco show on Saturday night at the Crossroads. The weather participated and we got no rain. It was my first visit to the venue, and while it was cool being outdoors downtown with the KC skyline all around, I think that will be my last show there. I am too (choose: spoiled/old/lazy) to stand in the middle of a field to watch live music. I guess I've done it too many times before. The show was great though; Jeff Tweedy is a great frontman. He is funny and can lead the band and audience with grace through their varied songs. Their music is so diverse, moving effortlessly from quiet acoustic ditties to loud, dissonant jams. They are one of the most interesting bands out there. And (guitarist) Nels Cline is so unique. He shakes, vibrates and contorts through his solos and Brian and I laugh when we come up with professions we’re glad he didn’t try…brain surgeon, moyle, tailor. Just watching him butter toast would be something to witness. Hattie stayed at Grammy and Grandpa’s house with all of the grandkids during the show. From the report we got, she did great, crawling many laps around the basement and observing all the action. It is so nice to be able to drop her off knowing she is in good hands (obviously!) and that she knows she’s in good hands. She was not so happy when we left her with her cousin a few weeks ago. Again, we were confidant she was in capable hands, but Hattie did not know her cousin's face as a familiar one, hence freaked out for a long while upon our departure. As Brian said, it is getting harder to leave her knowing that she may want us. When she was smaller, anyone would do. But now, at least for little while, Mom and Dad are the coolest people around. And I’ll take that while I can.

Almost forgot!

I almost forgot my most very favorite new thing Miss Hattie P. is doing...
When I get home from work, she crawls over to me and gives me a big hug. She puts her head on my chest and just lays there a minute. It is actually making me tear up right now just typing about it. "Highlight of my day" does not decribe it well enough. "Warming my heart" does not either. "Wonderful bonding time" isn't it.
Let's just say it feels like the finest moment of my entire life every single time.

HP Update

Hello. Long time no type. It’s been pretty busy around here, but thought I would throw in a Hattie update for you all. She’s been nothing but fun lately. Pointing at everything, ‘oohing’ a lot, and cruising the furniture like crazy. I initially thought she’d be walking by Halloween, but I don’t think she’ll be there. As much as she likes being upright, she doesn’t really seem in a big hurry. This is fine by me. We still haven’t proofed the house like we should’ve by now. But she is mellow enough that she’s content in the family room where she has full reign or in her pack and play upstairs. And I’ll take it while I can!
My mom made her a book with pictures of our family. It says, “We All Love Hattie” on the cover. Inside is a head shot of everyone with their name written above it. She absolutely loves looking through it. The last page is a picture of her. She’ll point at everyone as the pages are turned, but when she gets to the end, she smiles really wide, points and says “tata”. Will she be a total narcissist if her first word is ‘Hattie’? I don’t know if she really understands that is her or if it is just that one girl she sees in pictures and the one that is always watching her in the mirror. She is cute…
Here are a couple of new pics. One is at her activity table that she loves and the other is in the sink getting a quick bath. She pretty much overtakes the sink, but she likes it. It must remind her of when she was just a couple months old and would get baths in the kitchen. My, how she’s grown.

Ta Da!

The porch is 99.99999% done (big sigh of relief). We are so happy with it and have been spending a lot of time out there already. This week is finally turning fall-like, so we will have the door open all the time. Hooray! I took some pictures, but they really don’t do it justice, you’ll all just have to come over and see it sometime.

Porch Time

Been too busy to write much lately. Brian and I have been working on the never-ending porch project. I really do like home improvement projects, however, I always always kid myself into thinking its going to take ¼ of the time it ends up actually taking. Always. Every time. You would think after redoing our entire house I would have a better idea, but I guess I am a slow learner. Anyhow, we truly are in the home stretch now. We’ve got the outside to paint and I have one more chair cushion to recover. Oh, and a threshold to keep the rain from running in under the door. Hopefully we will be done on Saturday (no kidding myself this time). It looks soooo great. We had a little taste of fall last weekend (note the sweats in HP’s pics) but we’re back to 80s and 90s, damn it. I am ready for cool days and nippy evenings to sit and relax out there. I will snap a couple pics of the final outcome this weekend.
In the meantime, here are a couple of the girlio. She is still cruising like crazy, clapping, pointing at things, and eating all kinds of new foods. She is standing all the time now – she doesn’t sit down much. The first one is at her new play table. The second is what happens every time I break the camera out. I have several pics like it.

Music makes the world go round

I went to Karrie’s last night to meet the ladies out on her deck to visit and drink wine. It was a lovely evening and the company was fabulous, as always. My girlfriends are truly the best—how lucky I am to have them. The weather was perfect as well. I love that fall is coming…less bugs, less heat, and more dreaming of high school football games and getting excited to don the first sweater. Fall is definitely my favorite season.
On the drive down to Karrie’s, I put a mix cd in that I hadn’t heard in ages. It had “If you want to sing out, sing out” by Cat Stevens on it, from the movie Harold and Maude. I’ll start by saying that is one of my favorite movies. It makes me laugh out loud AND bawl every time. So good. Anyhow, emotions overcame me hearing that song and I began to think of other songs that have that effect on me. Some are from my childhood, like, “I Started A Joke” by the BeeGees. I remember thinking that was the saddest song ever written when I was 4. I actually remember crying when hearing it.
Anyhow, here’s a short list of some that bring out a whole range of emotions in me.
“If you want to sing out, sing out” Cat Stevens – if you’ve seen the movie, you know. If you haven’t; rent it. It’s a simple theme. Cherish life.
“Eleanor Rigby” The Beatles – another one as a kid that broke my heart, no one came to the funeral! And all those lonely people.
“Tears of Rage” The Band – I’ve never heard so much emotion in a voice. This is a must listen selection. The fact that he committed suicide years later makes it even more heart wrenching. Plus, it is the most pertinent tambourine in a song.
“Summertime” Janis Joplin – just a great version of a bluesy classic.
“No Rain” Blind Melon – I think of college days and that little chubby bee girl. She gets me every time. Corny, I know.
“In My Life” The Beatles – Brian and I danced to this at our wedding. I sang it to Hattie everyday I was pregnant with her. Do I need to say more?
Here are a few more classics, for differing reasons. And this list is not even close to being comprehensive...just what's on my mind at the moment!
“Ophelia” The Band – one of the best songs ever. Ever, I say!
“Wish You Were Here” Pink Floyd - I could listen to this song a million times and not tire of it. A true classic.
“Little Wing” Hendrix or Clapton – same deal. Classic.
“Strong Enough” Sheryl Crow – perfect sing along (acoustic KBCO version is best)
“Black Coffee in Bed” Squeeze – another good sing along, and it reminds me of Lake Lotawana with Ferk when we were in grade school
“Stir It Up” Bob Marley – just for groovin
“Can You Hear Me Knockin” The Rolling Stones – their best song and awesome to rock out to. That’s a band term, rock out, right? (FotConchords)
“Working Man” Rush – only good played extremely loud
"Ghost at Number 1" Jellyfish - another one that is very good very loud
I could add another hundred, but will stop there.
Bon weekend.

Update the Resume

We have lots of new things to add to Hattie’s bag of tricks. She had a very big week. In addition to the four new teeth, she is now clapping her heart out at anything and everything. Even with a few extremely grumpy days, we’re now cheering for everything. Dinner time? Hooray! Another toy? Hooray! Poopy diaper? Hooray! It’s a bit like being at a sporting event with all that applause. Dancing is another fun thing she’s been practicing. There’s been a lot of booty shaking going on. She’s not exactly Baryshnikov, but we’re getting there. I can't wait until she can stand and dance...that funny, squatty-thing kids do. Love that. It's always good for a giggle. She has also been pulling up some, but not without a few comical faces getting there. You'd think she was climbing Everest.
And the last thing-the one that I, personally, have been dreading… stranger anxiety. Yuck. We went to Brian’s brother’s house on Sunday for a cookout and HP absolutely flipped out just walking in the door. Too many (somewhat) unfamiliar faces all talking to her at once, I guess. She absolutely freaked out. Multiple times. The fact that we were missing nap time to be there didn’t help much. The fact that everyone there, bless them, thought that they could ‘fix her’ if they took her and held her didn’t help. Obviously, as a parent I don’t want my kid to be in pain, sad, or scared. But, she’s an infant and these things are inevitable. My problem with big groups is that I don’t want to make everyone listen to my screaming kid. And I want everyone to know what a laid-back, fantastic kid I have 99.9% of the time -- that was not apparent in any way that day! Oh well, these are things we will get over, I suppose. She and me. Her and I; whatever. In the meantime, I need to get her out more and used to seeing unfamiliar faces and places more often. We tend to stay at home a lot. But, we’re going exploring more now. Hopefully this stage will be a short one.
Regarding the pics… I absolutely love the one of Hattie and Brian. It highlights the hilarious-looking new teeth (Hattie’s not Bri’s) and the fun we typically have. The second one is her in one of her new favorite places…under her exersaucer. I guess it’s her first official ‘fort’. The third one is our dainty little flower with her new, mean, scrunch-face which we’ve been seeing a lot of these days. It’s usually accompanied by heavy panting. She’s a flower, she is.

Grins

This weekend Hattie smiled and I spied a tooth poking through on top. Upon further inspection, I saw FOUR teeth coming in! All on top. At first I saw only three-- one front tooth and two on either side. That would’ve looked pretty comical if the other front tooth had lagged. But it is now poking through, too. She is going to look so different soon. It’s amazing how quickly she is changing; I swear some days you can almost observe it happening.
She is also crawling a lot now. When she does, she breathes really loud and fast like she's having sooo much fun. This is good, as it makes it much easier to track her. I know she’s on a roll when I hear breathing and squealing. She’s pretty funny, that girl.
Lately I’ve been having these visions of her when she is bigger. The other day we were sitting under a fan, her hair blowing and we were laughing. I had this vision of her being 12 years old on an amusement park ride. It came in a flash and it makes me so excited to see what kind of person she is going to become. So far her personality is very laid back, but highly inquisitive-- she has to know everything going on, just like her dad. As her Grammy says, “she doesn’t miss a trick”. She also has Brian and my own love of music….she will stop whatever she is doing and listen to a song being played for several moments. She is very funny and loves us being goofy. Its funny that at such a young age babies know "goofy". And obviously, Brian and I are. She gets very excited when all three of us are together and we play. I do get the impression that it is the highlight of her day (its also mine). I can’t wait to watch her personality develop more and more as she gets older.
And I’ll get some pics of her toothy grin soon….

9 Months

Yesterday was Hattie's 9 month birthday. I can't believe she is already 3/4 of a year old! My mom bought her age cards to get a picture taken with each month. This month and last were pretty comical, as she wants to eat and play with the cards, not pose with them. Anyway, they are below with my favorite profile pic I took and some of the very cute puzzle my parents made for her. Yep, made.

100

Emily is ever my blog idol (all hail Queen of the Blog!). She made a list of 100 things about herself. It is supposed to be a self-enlightening process. I don't know about that, but I do know its probably more than anyone wants to know about me. And its terribly random. Here goes...
1. My shower is my dirty little secret. ‘Dirty’ being the key word.
2. My new eyes have made this terribly apparent-I used to live blissfully blind and unaware. How does a “cleaning area” become so dirty so quickly?
3. The rest of my house is pretty clean.
4. My husband is my best friend.
5. It is a huge pleasure having a copilot to share life with.
6. I love wine.
7. I enjoy a good buzz.
8. I enjoy a good buzz more often than I should.
9. I request catalogues just to get mail.
10. I do not like to see myself in pictures.
11. I do not like to be videotaped. At all.
12. When looking in the mirror, I do not look at the ‘big picture’ only small areas. Clean teeth, mascara application, hairdo, etc.
13. I do not own a full length mirror.
14. My daughter makes my heart smile more than anything else on earth.
15. They say that the average person laughs 17 times a day. With Brian, Hattie, friends and family I more than double that. Easily.
16. I like my freckles and loathe my age spots.
17. I consider my gray hairs a right of passage.
18. I choose a day to clean house when I know I can be home that night to snuggle in and enjoy it. And I do immensely.
19. I am a blusher who hates to blush. It’s a crippling weakness to me.
20. Some of the reasons I chose to be a scientist; fewer people to deal with
21. No presentations.
22. No dressing up.
23. Oh yeah, and I like science. It’s the hands-on part that I like. I’m no brainiac.
24. I am a big penny pincher when it comes to (most) things.
25. I don’t see any reason to pay obscene amounts of money to be a walking billboard.
26. I don’t see any reason to pay obscene amounts of money on clothing or purses to impress other people.
27. I don’t feel the need to ‘pamper’ myself much. My whole life is pretty cushy.
28. I’ve never had a pedicure.
29. I’ve had 1 (free) massage. This I may treat myself to again someday.
30. I’ve had 2 manicures and don’t get the appeal. My nails suck.
31. My girlfriends are one of my biggest assets. I couldn’t feel any more fortunate to have them. Most I have known since high school or longer.
32. I don’t talk to them nearly enough.
33. I am aiming for retirement at 55.
34. 35 would be better.
35. Short of being independently wealthy, I enjoy my job very much.
36. I refuse to buy Hattie any clothing with the word Princess or Diva on it.
37. Piercing the ears of babies makes me cringe. Aren’t their faces beautiful enough without painful adornments they didn’t choose?
38. A good cup of coffee is one of life’s great pleasures.
39. So is chocolate anything.
40. I am striving to be the kind of parent that my parents are to me.
41. My family is the best. Ever. Truly.
42. You can’t have them.
43. I have ridden on a fan boat in the Everglades.
44. I have visited 10 countries. England, Ireland and Switzerland are my favorites.
45. On my bad days, I daydream of shucking it all and moving to Ireland.
46. I regret not studying more in school.
47. The Sunday paper and lounging with family are what weekends are all about.
48. I am a horrible arguer/debater.
49. My best comebacks usually arrive an hour too late.
50. I watch too much tv, but enjoy it a lot.
51. My wardrobe is pretty pathetic.
52. I have a love/hate relationship with shopping.
53. And my body. It’s healthy & strong, but flabby.
54. I try to convince myself I like working out.
55. Most of the time, I do not.
56. I do get a high when I work out hard enough.
57. But it’s not often enough!
58. My opinions sometimes get in the way of my happiness.
59. Hattie is exceptional. And I am not biased.
60. My husband is goofy and sooo kind-hearted. Two of his best qualities.
61. Patience is not a virtue of mine.
62. But I am working on it.
63. Clowns frighten me.
64. So does public speaking.
65. And maggots.
66. And leeches.
67. If I could take my family and friends, I would move to the beach.
68. I love water. Drinkable, swimmable, watchable. I can stare at the ocean or a lake for hours. And have.
69. I am competitive, but hopefully in a fun way.
70. The last few years I have been embarrassed to be an American. Thanks, George.
71. I have a phone phobia. Hate talking to anyone I don’t see on a regular basis. I feel awkward and talk too fast. I’ve no idea why.
72. I don’t own a cell phone.
73. David Beckham and Matt Damon are pretty close to perfect physical specimens.
74. I doodle a lot.
75. My knees are beginning to sound like rice krispies.
76. I have a huge extended family all in KC. Huge. And they are really, really fun.
77. I’ve never broken a bone.
78. Hard physical labor is extremely rewarding to me. But I am glad I don’t have to do it for a living.
79. Our yard is in a sad state of affairs.
80. I enjoy working in the yard, but don’t do it nearly enough. HP is my excuse.
81. After her bath time, I sniff Hattie more than I probably should.
82. I love my car.
83. After life at KU, I am pretty adept at parallel parking.
84. I tried to learn drums, but my sense of timing is not so good. It is fun, though!
85. I wish for Hattie her father’s musical abilities.
86. Even with my fear of public speaking, I have always dreamed of being a great singer.
87. When I am not in a hurry, I like my handwriting.
88. I would absolutely hate living in Hollywood or L.A.
89. I love board games.
90. One of 3 “Bs” always sounds good. Beatles, Bob (Marley) or The Band.
91. I could live on grilled veggies, pizza, tofu stir fry and Chipotle burrito bowls.
92. Add chocolate and baked goods to that list.
93. At all times I have all the ingredients in my kitchen to make chocolate chip cookies.
94. I wish I could express myself better when I am angry or upset.
95. Does anyone really need or want to know this much about me?
96. I have become much less lazy as I’ve aged and become a wife and mom. I like that.
97. Hattie is my joy in life, but sometimes I miss my independence and freedom.
98. Compassion is a quality I am working on.
99. The older I get, the mellower my music becomes.
100. My life is pretty damn good.

My New Friend

For my Dad’s birthday, JKNJLL and BAH bought 2 tickets to Willie Nelson. We were excited to purchase something a little more fun than a new garden hose or drill bits. But alas, Mom and Dad got an opportunity to go on a swanky trip that week. Obviously staying in a super-lux condo in the mountains takes precedence over seeing an old pot smoking hippie croon. So, we are working on a replacement concert for them and selling the tickets for more than peanuts. This is where my new friend comes into play. Craigslist.org. L-O-V-E I-T. It took 2 seconds to list my ad. Within hours we had one offer, within a day had 3 more, and all offered over face value. Of course with Ticketmasters monopoly (yeah Supreme Court, I said MONOPOLY) and their rape of the common consumer to print out a simple ticket, face value is not really face value anymore. But I digress. My point is that I love craigslist. I have a new friend who is treating me well. We talked about doing eBay, but that takes several days, locks you in, and takes a cut. Plus you can’t pay cash and have to worry about mailing, PayPal, blah blah blah. Craigslist is only local people, and you cut out all middlemen and go directly buyer-seller. The woman who is purchasing our tix is from Lawrence and buying the tickets as a birthday gift for her boyfriend. I am meeting her at a McDonalds near my work. (A crowded McDonalds, Mom. No worries.) She will bring me cash, and I will bring her tix. Done deal. If it doesn’t work out for some reason, I have 3 other people’s emails to fall back on. Love it.

On Your Mark, Get Set, Go!

Hattie crawled forward for the first time yesterday! She has been stuck in reverse for a month or more, so this was a big milestone. Our baby is crawling….break out the baby gates! Pretty soon you won’t be able to take two steps in our house without maneuvering through a gate (we have many stairs). And I need to start wearing my sneakers everyday because the chase will be on.
Speaking of, thought I'd throw in a picture of Elton herself.

Koko, High Five

Last week a sales rep came in to meet with me briefly about some (expensive) lab equipment I had ordered. The meeting took all of 10 minutes. When the rep got up to leave and we were saying our goodbyes, he put his fist out to give me the “knuckle bump” or whatever the hell you call it. What the? Are handshakes becoming passé? I had met this person once prior to the meeting. I must say it threw me totally off guard, as I customarily put my hand into handshake position when I saw him lifting his hand. It was awkward and really annoyed me, quite frankly. If you are afraid of germs, skip the handshake and I won’t care a bit. But I did not just score the winning point in the big game, so save the high five-type crap for your homeys. Guess I have a new pet peeve. At least I rarely hear "Git er done" (ew.) anymore, so that's a bonus for the pet peeve department.

Hangin' in da crib

We've been entering Hattie's room lately to find this.
She has learned to sit up from a laying position and will scoot over and grab hold of her mobile buddies. She looks so proud of herself when I go in and find her doing it. Needless to say, the crib is moving down a notch today.
The screened porch is coming right along and looks soooooo awesome. I must say I am so happy with our handyman (friend of Brian's). He is rocking right along and the quality is very impressive. Its a million times nicer than the porch at our old house. I can't wait for it to be done -and the temp to be less than 105- so we can start using it! We are taking pictures of the progress and I will post when we're finishing up, hopefully in a couple days.
Happy weekend!

Queen of Tomatoes

We had an influx of home-grown tomatoes filling our kitchen over the weekend. I think we had close to 20. While I love them with just salt & pepper, I don’t think my mouth could’ve handled quite that much acidity. So yesterday I turned domestic goddess and made big batches of pico de gallo, gazpacho, and fresh tomato and zucchini sauce. I was up to my armpits in tomato, but it was well worth it. Summer would not be summer without tomatoes. Or the farmer’s market. And this year the farmer’s market is carrying fun colors of vegetables. I have found that I LOVE orange tomatoes (very low acidity) and bright yellow zucchini (very sweet & mild). Even though the crowds are huge, I love bringing my own canvas bag and pretending I am a European woman picking out that day’s meals. Of course hopping into my car to drive 3 miles home destroys that dream. But I am an American. Where’d I park my Hummer anyway?

Spray This

Had a busy but fun weekend. Parties, cooking, and loads of power washing. We borrowed my cousin’s power washer to clean our patio in preparation for our new screened porch being installed this week. I was AMAZED at the difference. I never realized how black the concrete was. My first swipe over it looked like an oreo cookie. It made it fun to do…I love cleaning when I can see progress like that. (Hmm, maybe that will be my excuse to go longer in between house cleanings…) I had so much fun doing it that by the end I had sprayed our lawn furniture, garage, driveway, grills, lawn mower, and just about anything else I could find (damn neighbor’s cat wouldn’t come near me). I spent a total of about 5 hours doing it and my forearms could tell you as much. Ouch.
As I mentioned, we are having a porch put on this week off our kitchen. I can’t wait for it to be done. I have been feeling guilty that Hattie does not go outside as often as she should, which means none of us do. She still hates her jogging stroller, so I have resorted to working out to the exercise channel when she takes naps. The jogging stroller thing still makes no sense to me for a kid that likes to take car rides and loves to be outside. ??? But I digress. Our backyard is extremely buggy and there is not a good place to hang out right now. But this will not be the case by next week! We are hoping to make it very “room-like” – half walls painted white with screened tops, a good ceiling fan and sisal carpet. I anticipate spending tons of time out there. Will keep you posted.

Butterflies

This weekend I watched as Hattie observed a butterfly flittering about our backyard. It gave me pause as I remembered a day when I was pregnant with her...
I was at a medical office taking a 3 hour long glucose test. There was a lot of sitting and waiting involved, so I watched out the window as people came and went from the office building. I gazed out at a feeble old man inching his way towards the front door of the building when he stopped in his tracks. I assumed he was catching his breath or possibly had remembered something left in his car. But then a smile came over his face as he stood and watched a small butterfly moving about in the bushes. He grinned as the butterfly finally flew up and away. It struck me as such a simple and beautifully pure scene. Instantly tears came to my eyes and still do when I think of him. When my days begin to get hectic and threaten to move past without pause, I will try and remember how little it takes to stop and enjoy the simple pleasures in life. Have a beautiful week.

My Own Personal Yogi

Here are some of the pics of Hattie I promised. The bath time ones are self-explanatory. The next is one I like to call “Downward Dog” (its a yoga move, for you non-yoga people out there). She gets some really good rear end height most of the time. This particular one she was on her way down. Rest assured her form is really good. Any yogi would be proud.
She is not technically crawling yet, but she can scoot with the best of ‘em. She’ll make laps around our family room going in reverse and rolling. Brian’s prediction is within 2 weeks she’ll be crawling and not stuck in reverse anymore. While this is very exciting and a big milestone, I don’t know if I am ready. We still have so much baby-proofing to do. Outlets must be covered, plants moved, cabinets rearranged, and a hundred baby gates installed. Plus, that means in a couple weeks the chase is on. She’ll be into everything. We will be viewing our house in a whole new light.
Besides scooting, HP is babbling, cooing, ‘sssss’ing, and giving fish faces. She puckers and sucks til she gives this big ‘pop’ at the end. It’s pretty cute. Still only has the 2 teeth, or 'headlights' as Grandpa calls them. She is smiling and laughing more than ever before, too. I love, love, love that she is such a happy baby. Makes my job soooo much easier. She is also doing this cool thing with her hands where she will take a toy and flip it over in one hand, pass it to the other, flip it, pass it to the other, flip it. She is such a talented girl…

Hair Inspiration

I chopped all my hair off last weekend. It’s short and feels good. And I am having a good hair day today, which always helps. I didn’t have many (any) of those with my long hair. Since so much of it fell out after I had Hattie, I had all these weird short hairs that made my hair look frizzy all the time. It was flyaway city. So, here’s the picture I took to Gina (friend and stylist). Ah Meg, you are always my hair inspiration…

Of course I still look nothing like her, but I am not a 6 foot tall skinny blond with my own team of hair people spending hours to make it look ‘perfectly messy’. Gina did a great job. Now if I can just get it to stop growing so I don’t have to go back in a week I’ll be a happy girl.

Speaking of hair, I will have to post a pic of HP. Her hair is still only growing upwards. It totally defies the law of gravity. It is so soft, downy like a duck, and it makes me smile every time I see her. Well, of course I'd be smiling at her anyhow but the hair helps. I promise to post some new pics soon.

They work!

Just got back from my next day follow up from surgery. I am 20/15 with both eyes (yes folks, that is better than perfect!). Who would've thought I could claim 'better than perfect' on anything in my life??? Amazing. When I woke this morning and looked out at the fence in our backyard I noted how detailed it looked - better than it did with my glasses on. I was right - I can practically see through walls today. Alright not really, but I am soooo elated. Everything seems brighter, crisper and more beautiful. I have a fresh start with my new eyes. It is absolutely spectacular.
The surgery went off without a hitch. I must say it is a strange, freaky, surreal ordeal. I am not a squeamish person and actually like going to the doctor because I find it endlessly fascinating. My inner science geek comes out. But I could've
done without the procedure yesterday. Yes it was pretty painless and quick, but the whole thing was totally nerve-wracking. I'll detail the whole thing below for those interested....
Upon arrival, you receive a Valium. I am not sure if that was to take the edge off of the anticipation of the surgery or the monster check you have to write them. But at this point I was excited and not really nervous. They then gave me some numbing drops and marked the center of my eye. Not my eye; my eyeBALL. With a marker! That was the first crazy thing. I was then taken into the surgical suite and laid down flat on my back. One eye was taped shut. The other had the clockwork orange clamp put on it and a suction cup pressed onto my eyeball. The room went black. It sort of pushes down and creates a lot of pressure, not on your eyeball, but on your socket. An Intralase laser puts 'bubbles' in a circle around your eye. I picture it like a perforation. This is how they know exactly where to cut the flap (Intralase is new technology - much more accurate). They repeated that on the other eye. Next they slid me over to the laser to make the flap - it is quick. The doc then takes these tiny needle-looking things and pulls back the flap and everything goes blurry. I wondered just how freaky I must've looked at that point with clamps on and the front of my eyeball hanging down. Ew.
Next, you go under one more laser. You concentrate on looking into a light until your pupils dilate enough and the laser comes on and vaporizes part your cornea. This was the most nerve-wracking part....What if I freak out and look away from the light? What if it burns down too much of my eye? Am I still looking in the right direction (the light was disappearing for me). It only lasts a few seconds (thank God) and that's it. (BTW- the laser somehow anticipates your eye movements and follows suit.) The doc 'flaps' you back down and uses a tiny squeegee-looking thing to smooth the flap into place. They give you another Valium and you are on your way. I napped for a couple hours and with every passing hour my vision became clearer and my eyes less sensitive.
Today, still less than 24 hours afterwards, I can see better than before. I have a little 'grittiness' and fogginess in my eyes and that's it. It is an absolutely mind-blowing technology and I am so thankful to have been able to do it.
Totally worth not taking a big trip this year. I am free.
My doctor told me that the Intralase laser is the one used on the Top Gun pilots, so I am calling them today to see when I get to fly my jet.

Peepers

Tomorrow is the day I am getting my eyes fixed. Hooray! I am very excited. I figured out I have relied on these --insert curse word here-- for 21 years. I anticipate a huge feeling of relief and freedom come tomorrow. Although last night I did have a dream that a different doctor who wouldn’t talk to me was going to do my surgery. I kept trying to tell my mom it was a ‘bait and switch’ but could only get out ‘meet and greet’. She didn’t know what I was talking about, obviously, so I convinced her we had to run away. So I guess I am a little more anxious about it than I thought. From what I’ve read it is a very low risk procedure with no real down time. I’ve been instructed to take a nap when I get home and stay out of the pool for a couple weeks. Despite my dream, I am confident in my choice of doctors. He is incredibly nice, competent and one of the best in the area. I feel safe going to him, so wish me luck! And if you need me this weekend, you'll find me at the mall shopping for sunglasses and getting a new haircut.

Teeth, Donuts and Diets

Hello blog world, it’s been awhile. Things have been slightly hectic around the home front lately. HP has a cold (again)…I think she’s teething. And last night the stomach flu fairy visited Brian. So, we’ve been having all kinds of fun at our house!
Other than those goodies, I don’t have too much to write about. Some weeks I could write a book - others, not a word. Such is life, I guess. I have lost 2 pounds, so I guess that’s something. Not the 20 I was hoping to lose the first day and be done, but what are you gonna do? The diet is going okay for me; it’s more of an improvement on my eating than a diet per se. So I imagine the loss will be pretty slow. I did pass up free donuts one morning and free bagels the next. That’s really good for me. Free goodies are hard to pass up! My cavewoman gatherer instinct kicks in and I want to hoard free food for future use when I see it- grunting, and knocking others out of the way to get to it. Especially when it is chocolate cream-filled goodness. Mmmm, donuts. I mean, mmmm, rice cakes.

Let's get physical

This is “d” day 2007. I am officially “dieting”. Yuck. I am normally not a dieter at all (as my size 12 jeans will tell you). I think the last diet I was on was a cabbage soup diet in college. That lasted about 5 days before I was ready to throw any cabbage I spotted against the nearest wall. This is a long time coming, though. While I am back at my pre-pregnancy weight, the body does not match the number. I have lost so much muscle mass and am lumpy in places that shouldn’t be lumpy. My exercise schedule has been less than, well, existent lately. So starting today I am pushing proteins, getting active and drinking tea instead of coffee (my coffee has an equal ratio of coffee: sugar: creamer). I looked briefly into the new Alli diet pills they are pushing in ads. That is until I read the very first side effect, “gas with oily discharge”. Ew. I think I can do 10-20 lbs. myself without any sort of oily discharge issues, thank you. Now if I can just get this Rocky song out of my head…

G-pa and the kids

I love this pic of Grandpa and the kids. Too bad Nicko is blocked out...he was Hattie's only hope to not look pasty with all the brown kids!

Random Notes

1. The surprise anniversary dinner went off without a hitch (save for a tired and glassy-eyed but content little girl). B&B were surprised and delighted. I must say I am rather proud of myself for that one. I made dinner, I decorated, I picked out and bought the group present and they’re not even my parents! I am good. And oh so very humble.
2. Brian and Hattie decided to share their colds with me. They’re very generous people you know. Mine has now developed into a cough. I remembered an email I received not too long ago about putting Vic’s Rub on the bottom of your feet before going to bed to stave off a cough all night. I must say it is so strange, but it totally works. As soon as I put it on the tickle in my throat went away. I didn’t cough until about 5:00 in the morning. Amazing. So, there’s at least one true email floating around out there in webland.
3. And you wonder why we’re all fat…
One of Brian and my favorite Asian restaurants closed down about a month ago. It was very disappointing, as it carried us through many pregnant nights when nothing sounded good but a ‘tofu hot pot’ or ‘beef noodle soup’. We just saw that they reopened (same owners – different name) as a buffet. Are we really that hungry? Does one good entrée just not suffice anymore? Do we really need 25 entrees and all the fried appetizers we can shove down our gullets? I guess so. We went back to investigate. Fried Rangoon. Fried egg roll. Fried rice. Humph. But there is one saving grace…you can order off a menu that resembles their menu of old. Steamed rice. Miso. Tofu. Light sauce. Main dish soups. Heaven. Maybe we can begin again, Tien Tien.
4. Hattie had her first swim on Sunday at my aunt’s pool. She was pretty funny with it. Didn’t like it at all at first and just made this whining/grunting noise when I dipped her in. It was pretty comical. After awhile I guess she got used to the temperature being much cooler than the bathtub and started to get into it more. By the end she was splashing a bit (notice her wet face in the pic) and sitting on her floaty while we swished around. We will definitely be back. My girl’s going to be a water baby…she looks too good in her suit not to.

Blah Blah Blah

Words are falling out of my mouth today. Every once in a while, and way more often than I’d like, I have days where things come flying out of my mouth before my brain can edit them. Today has been one of those days. I don’t think I’ve offended anyone or anything, but I feel like a jackass when I blurt random things out. Sometimes I can cover with ease. Other times, not so much. I wish I had the foresight and intelligence to edit myself or at least the grace and poise to recover when I do say something offensive, wrong, or just plain stupid. But alas, I do not. A rewind button would be nice, but I suspect I would become neurotic with that and always search for the absolute perfect thing when, in life, there is no such thing as perfect. My new goal is to quit revisiting it all and move on. I am pretty good at kicking myself for past wrongs. Not to say I wouldn’t apologize or make amends if something goes terribly wrong with this mouth of mine, but nearly all conversations are fleeting and should remain as such. And I can continue to wish that people only remember the funny, kind and clever things I say. A girl can hope, right?

7 Months

Well it was bound to happen sooner or later. I guess 7 months could be considered ‘later’ –my baby has her first cold/flu. It arrived on her 7 month birthday’s eve. I think I said a hundred times yesterday, ‘poor lil thing’ or ‘poor lil peanut’. Of course to add insult to injury, Brian is also sick AND tonight we are hosting a 50th wedding anniversary surprise dinner for his parents. Great timing. 20 people coming to our germ-infested house for a fancy sit-down dinner. Eeek. I’ve already got the tables out, china placed, 7 pork tenderloins marinating, and two little glassy-eyed snot balls. Oh well, I will Lysol the heck out of the house and hope for the best. I know Brian is so disappointed to be feeling crummy, as his brother and sister in law are in town for the weekend from Houston to surprise his parents. When they are in town he practically lives at his mom and dad’s house for those few days to catch up on lost time. His whole family does. And I know he is so excited to introduce Hattie to them in person. I really hope she can smile through the germs…
She did not sleep well last night, poor lil thing (101). She is so congested that she had a hard time breathing when laying down, was coughing and sneezing, and cried out with every turn in her crib. She was surprisingly happy before bedtime, just moving a little slower than usual and needing more cuddle-time. Of course, this is never a problem for Brian and me. Today may be a very different story with her rotten night. Although, she better be able to step it up tonight for our guests... her show starts at 6:00, poor lil peanut. 102.

Rose Colored Glasses

Well, it’s official. I am getting new eyes. New eyes! I had an appointment on Monday and found that I am a good candidate for lasik surgery. Yes, it’s expensive. Yes, I feel a bit guilty about spending so much money on ‘cosmetic’ surgery, but boy am I excited! No more fumbling for glasses first thing in the morning. No more squinting in the sunlight because I don’t have prescription sunglasses. No more big dents on the sides of my nose. No more little hands deftly trying to grab my glasses clean off my head. It’s going to be great! Everyone I have talked to who’s had it done said it was the best money they ever spent. Let’s hope it holds true for me, too. My surgery is scheduled for Friday, July 13th (no I am not superstitious). It only takes a few minutes and I should immediately see around 20/20; something I haven’t done since elementary school. Hooray! Now if I could just do something about these wrinkles…

Genuine Smiles and Happy Toes

Friday night Brian, Hattie and I went with my parents to Gardner Lake for a wine cruise at sunset. My Great-Uncle Dick and cousins go every night at 7:00 on their pontoon boat. It was a perfect night for it. We snapped some pics...I especially love the one with Grammy, Grandpa and HP in the evening sunlight.
The rest of the weekend was crazy but good, with birthday parties, Father’s Day events and general busyness. Hattie was a trooper with all of the running around we did. As Brian said the other day, she becomes more and more her own person everyday. This is so true. She definitely has her likes, dislikes and quirks. Right now her quirk is toes. She LOVES toes. Will stretch and strain to get a peek at them, and smiles like they are talking to her. It’s pretty comical. She is sitting up well, and loves the bath tub and high voices. If Brian sings to her falsetto or if I do my Minnie Mouse voice, she giggles at us like we’re nuts. Of course we are, but I am surprised she figured it out so quickly.
Upon waking from naps now, she gets on her tummy and peeks out her door. We get giant smiles when she sees us coming. That is my favorite smile, I must admit. Tired eyes, stretched neck and genuine happiness. It makes my heart melt every time. I have loved her from the start, but it grows exponentially every single day. Every day as she becomes more her own person.

'Scuse me while I kiss this guy

I perform a test on Tuesdays that takes me most of the morning. It also requires I be alone in a small lab (which I rather enjoy). The only station that comes in is a classic rock station, so I daydream back to my youth, sing terribly out of tune and contemplate what all is happening with my week. While singing, I always realize how much I truly suck at interpreting lyrics. Brian laughs at me all the time and asks what I am singing. So I thought I would make a list of a few of the ones I know I have wrong (and there are more everyday). The funny thing is, even when I figure out the correct words I usually regress back to my own funky version.
Enjoy. I'll add more as I think of them...
White winged dove by Fleetwood Mac AKA White winter by Amy
Big ol’ jet airliner by Steve Miller AKA We go jet airliner by Amy
Rhiannon by Fleetwood Mac AKA Well yeah….no by Amy(Sing it, I swear it sounds just like it!)
Dirty deeds done dirt cheap by ACDC AKA dirty dee dunder chee by Amy
Eminence front by The Who AKA Evelyn Strut by Amy
I’d be a great lyricist, huh?

Rebel Rebel

I did something bad this weekend. Funny, but bad. I have been conflicted about it since it happened. On one hand, I giggled for several minutes. On the other, my stomach kind of knots up when I think about it and I feel bad for being mean. Oh well, here’s the story. Don’t call the cops on me.
Saturday I went to a friend’s house for a birthday party. I had a great time chatting and being out (something you appreciate so much more after having kids). Later in the night, I had to go out and move my car to allow someone out of the driveway that I had blocked in. Upon reparking, I notice this cool old sports car. I don’t know a whole lot about cars, but I thought it was a Corvair. My understanding was that in the 60’s Cheverolet made kind of ‘special edition’ Corvettes called Corvairs. Well, I guess I was wrong. When I went inside and asked whose car it was, a boy answered with whom I have never seen eye to eye. Not even a little bit. But, I try to be nice to everyone (thanks Mom and Dad) so I tell him genuinely that his car is very cool and I ask him if it’s a Corvair. Well you would’ve thought I went up and punched him in the gut and insulted his mother. He got all pissy and snuffed at me and denied that’s what it was. I had no idea I could offend someone so easily. I apologized and backtracked saying I do not know much about cars. This had no effect on the a-hole. He was saying something about calling his car a Chevette or Pinto or god knows what. Sheesh. I say again, “Well, it’s a nice car.” At the time I let it slide and didn’t think too much about it. But by the time I left I was revisiting the whole thing and thinking just what a p**ck this guy really is. When I was leaving I had to pass the car again. This time I thought it was a pretty car and I wish I had a can of paint to dump on it, a bat to smash it, a beer to throw at it, a key to scratch it. Visions that I would never follow through on, obviously. But I did have a bottle cap in my car. A shiny little cap could do no damage, right? So as I drove away I tossed it into the convertible. It made a little tinkling sound when it landed and I giggled all the way home. I am SUCH a rebel. I pictured him getting in his precious little Pinto and crying when he realized someone was mean to him and his car. Of course the next day guilt set in. What if he sat on the cap and it scratched the leather seat? What if it poked him in the rear? I’m no outlaw I realize. I almost called to apologize. Outlaw no, coward…maybe? I think I will stick to daydreaming about possible transgressions and give my gut a rest.

Chompers

The pic does not lie. Our girl has teeth. And they are razor sharp. I can’t imagine those little things bumping against my top gums all day long. Ouch. No wonder she’s been ‘not herself’ (mama’s nice way of saying crabby) in the evenings. This and the fact she’s decided only one nap a day will do. No young one, it will not do. For all of us, please take two. We love your 11 hour nights, but please give us one more during the day. Mama needs it just as much as you do.
We took her to the park on Sunday. We sat by the water and watched the sailboats and ducks. Well, Brian and I sat by the water and watched the sailboats; HP watched the grass and her dad’s sunglasses most of the day. Before long she will be begging us to take her out there to feed the ducks. There are so many things like that I look forward to experiencing with her. Zoo trips, days at the pool, roller coasters, bike rides, camping adventures, Colorado trips, beach days, and Disney World. Already watching her discover something new makes me light up like a candle. And these are small things, like noticing her toes or watching a bird in the sky. This will only become more magnified as she grows and we witness the joy of discovery together. It makes me appreciate life in a whole new way. She makes me appreciate life in a whole new way. Thanks, Hattie Pearl. I can’t wait to continue our ride together.

Socialites

Last weekend was Jazzoo. For those of you who’ve not heard of it, it is a fundraising event for the kc zoo. About 5,000 attend at $175-250 a head, so it is a monster money maker. There are something like 100 restaurants that have booths with nibbles, along with free booze and several bands. Jackie serves on the steering committee, and we were honored to receive her additional free VIP (!) tickets. I have wanted to attend for years and it did not disappoint. Brian and I got dolled up and met Jack, Ted, Jilly and Tim and ate and drank ourselves silly. We strolled, chatted, people-watched and listened to music. The rain held off for us and the liquor flowed freely. I did not want it to end. It was a delicious evening.

Girl in the bubble

If you are squeamish, skip this post. Really. It is pretty sickening. At least I know I am highly disturbed by it, but maybe it is all just me. Anyway, here goes…
Last night I was prepared to make us a nice, healthy dinner. Grilled chicken, broccoli and whole grains. The grains come in a box from Near East. Alright, here comes the disturbing part, stop if you wish. Last chance. When I opened the box and pulled out the spice packet I noticed something was stuck to it. Figuring it was grains, I tried to brush it into the pan of water. It was not brushing in. I looked closer. It was…..a live maggot. A MAGGOT for f’s sake! In my kitchen! I looked in the box and he had friends, live friends. A nearly threw up and then proceeded to wig out in my kitchen screeching, shaking uncontrollably (still doing it, just writing this) and washing my hands violently. I am not usually so squeamish but maggots are my hugest fear. They.Freak.Me.Out. Completely. Utterly. More than anything else. For my Mom, its snakes. For me, maggots. They make me want to run and shower for hours, burn the house down and start from scratch. Bleach everything. Live in a bubble. Anyhow, after flipping out for several minutes, my dear husband came, cleaned the kitchen and made dinner that included no grains or rice of any sort. Eeeeeew! Am I overreacting? I seriously am still so disgusted by this. I wrote the company this morning. Brian threw out the other 2 boxes in the pantry. I just bought them last week. My girlfriends think I should call the store because it probably happened there, but it was a sealed box, so I don’t see how that could’ve happened at the store. Don’t really want to think about how it happened and am ready to clear my head of the whole thing. That is after I bleach my entire house tonight. Where is my bubble?

Simple

I don’t have much to write about today. As a matter of fact, I don’t have nearly as much to write about in this blog as I thought I would. My life is pretty ordinary I suppose. In a good way. I have a couple of friends (and family) that thrive on chaos in their lives; most of the time utterly self-induced chaos. Brian and I don’t have this chaos. Or want it, for that matter. Sure we’re busy and it is a lot of work raising the most beautiful and gifted child in the world (not biased), but we roll along fairly seamlessly most days. It helps tremendously that we both lean towards homebody-ness, are easily entertained, and parsimonious (there’s your word for the day, kids). We enjoy sharing a bottle of red wine and playing with Hattie more than about anything else in this world. We’re simple folk. Makes it sound like we’re living on a farm in Podunk Kansas somewhere, but the booming metropolis that is Kansas City does elude us most nights. Although this weekend we will become part of the elite of Kansas City when we hit Jazzoo with a vengeance. Roar.

I-Dull

Last night was the season finale of American Idol. Yes, Brian and I both watch it (I am not taking all the blame, ahem, I mean credit). I got him hooked the first season and we’ve been wasting our time on it ever since. Yes, it is a show for fourteen year olds. Yes, the music sucks and we have never bought an album. No, we have not once voted. However, we do discuss contestants like we are producing them ourselves. For instance, this year the top 3 went home in the correct order. Melinda was by far the best singer, but she is older and would be better suited to have a career not run by some cheesy Idol producer. She could do Broadway or make an album geared told an older non-Idolesque crowd. She has gained attention and respect and I am sure doors are opening wide for her. Blake will also do fine without being number one. He can write his own stuff and already has his own sound. As crappy as that sound may be. Jordin is only 17 and does not have a style of her own. She sings country well, she sings pop well, and she sang that horrid first single well. She is a moldable little lump of clay for the producers to do with what they wish. I could not imagine being a junior in high school and having this title bestowed upon me. Of course, I guess that’s why she tried out. She seems a sweet girl and I hope she enjoys the ride. It will be a crazy one.
I have one additional note for the producers of the show (as I am certain they read this blog). Can we please not give awards to the pitiable, mentally-challenged people who tryout each year? These poor kids are being made fun of in front of an entire nation and do not realize it. It makes me sad. Next year let’s focus on good singers who get to move on to Hollywood. I don’t need to see people disgracing themselves in front of America. George Bush already owns that pony.

Six Months

Yesterday was Hattie’s six month birthday. I celebrated by having a martini when she was down for her evening nap. It is very rare that I have a martini, and when I do I feel like I should put on pearls, my best swing dress and wait for my darling husband to come home from a long day at the office. Just call me June Cleaver. With liquor. I did relish every drink of that olive concoction, and may have to partake more often...
Speaking of June Cleaver, I’ve been making Hattie’s baby food at home. (I am so domestic.) It’s pretty fun to make and tastes a million times better than the jarred stuff. That stuff is crap with a capitol C. Yuck. It bears no resemblance to the original food at all. Tonight I will be cooking up some sweet potatoes, pears, apples, peas and butternut squash portions (not all together). We’ll see what the girlio thinks of them. So far she’s been into everything but prunes. Who could blame her there, though?

Dali

I heard somewhere that Salvador Dali used to go to sleep holding a
metal spoon over a plate. When he would slip into a deep sleep, he
would drop the spoon and wake himself to remember the half-dreams he would have. Many of his works were inspired by those thoughts/dreams. While I was in Spain I got to visit his home near Cadaquez (a gorgeous seaside village). I realized there that it wasn't only his half-dreams that were totally bizarre, but I digress. My exercise for anyone reading this is to try it. You don't need the spoon & plate, just try and stay 'conscious' when you are falling asleep. Its a lot like meditating in that you stay in the moment and let thoughts come to you and float on by. Don't focus on one thing happening, just let things be. It is totally amazing what my brain does when I achieve this and I would be interested to hear what other people experience. These days I am so tired I am usually asleep before my head hits the pillow, but on those great, rare occasions I will achieve 'brain surrealism'.

Life

My brother just sent me this quote. Lovely, and so true.

Life is an opportunity, benefit from it. Life is a beauty, admire it. Life is a dream, realize it. Life is a challenge, meet it. Life is a duty, complete it. Life is a game, play it. Life is a promise, fulfill it. Life is sorrow, overcome it. Life is a song, sing it. Life is a struggle, accept it. Life is a tragedy, confront it. Life is an adventure, dare it. Life is luck, make it. Life is life, fight for it!
- Mother Teresa

Queen Bee

This Sunday is Mother’s Day. As a new mom, I have been thinking a lot about motherhood and how fortunate I am to have the epitome of motherhood as my example in life. Mom has taught me more than I could ever realize or begin to express in words. She is “Mom” – protector, provider, nurturer, nurse, friend, confidante, rock. If I can be even half the mother that Mom has been to me, Hattie will be blessed.
She has taught me...
Family is king and always comes first.
Friends are jewels.
Knowledge is strength.
Humility is vital.
Laughter truly is the best medicine.
Learn spelling, grammar and multiplication early, you will always use them.
Mistakes are inevitable, and your honesty about them is essential.
A mother’s arms define tenderness.
Respect comes to those with strong morals.
You must speak up when something is wrong, but maintain your calm & composure.
Babies are for snuggling.
A bad day for you does not necessitate a bad day for everyone.
And most of all…
Life is for living. Enjoy every second and hold on tightly.

Mom, I love you so much that my heart could burst. You are my idol and I wish for you everything in life, you deserve it more than anyone I know. Happy Mother's Day.


"A mother is not a person to lean on but a person to make leaning unnecessary."
-- D.C. Fisher

Rain, rain, go away...

I am going to start building an ark. It’s been raining forever and is not supposed to stop for another 6 days. I wonder how many basements in KC are doomed at this point. Its crazy! On Sunday I was slated to play in a Corporate Challenge golf tournament and backed out last week to let someone else play who seemed a little more rabid about it (only 2 people are allowed in). For me, it was about drinking beer, hitting some balls and hanging out with a work friend of mine. We got ‘points’ for just showing up and I knew we weren’t going to win it. Well, it stormed like a mother yesterday morning and as I was lying in bed I thought what a wonderful decision it was to back out (check in was at 6:30, to boot). Terrible to think such things, but my bed was extra snuggly yesterday morning.
Brian and I had another wonderful weekend. Friday we met Jeff, Kris, Karrie & Taj at Ponaks for the world’s best margaritas. We then headed back to our house for a game night. It was a blast, but went entirely too quickly. Seemed like we had just gotten started and it was already midnight. I had such a great time…it was fun to have an adults only night to hang out and catch up with some of my most favorite people. The rest of the weekend consisted of birthday parties, Mother’s Day cookouts, and lots of family. Good times.
Today I thought I would give an update on Hattie and her doings these days…
She is 5 ½ months now. We haven’t started her on any veggies yet, but she loves her cereal and giggles halfway through eating it every night. I don’t know if it’s the funny faces I make trying to get a good spoonful in, or if I am tickling her with the spoon when I am cleaning her chin and cheeks, but she loves it. It’s so funny because she typically has a bunch of cereal in her mouth when she starts smiling and laughing, so it looks like she has teeth. I love that giggle…
She is also grabbing and holding toys. I think her teeth are pretty close to coming in – you can feel big bumps on her bottom gum and all toys get chomped on these days. She can roll over from her front to back, but not back to front. This makes it difficult to do ‘tummy time’ which docs recommend for back and neck strength. She has never really liked doing it and now that she can roll over, she does, when put on her belly. I wonder if she will be slow to crawl because of it. We’ll see. She can sit up with a little help keeping her steady. Same with standing. She loves her exersaucer, Bumbo seat, activity gym, crib and her dad. She always has smiles for Brian. It’s so cute…she is definitely daddy’s girl (much to Brian’s delight of course). She does not do a pacifier, but I think will have a woobie. She likes hanging onto blankets when put in her crib.
Overall she is a very happy baby and I could not be more proud.

Cereal nights

Here's a few new ones. The 5 month pic was from a couple weeks ago. The high chair ones were from last night...her first night in the chair. Very exciting. They were taken about 5-10 minutes apart, but notice the hand. It didn't move the whole time through her feeding. Is she cute or what?

Hands off the baby

I know that Hattie is incredibly squishable and one of the most beautiful babies ever and everything,(and no, I am not biased) but why, oh why do random people feel the need to touch her? Here’s a tip. If you don’t know the parents or the baby…hands off! I do not want your germs. Lord knows what you’ve got or where’ve you been. Yesterday at the craft store a woman decided to tickle Hattie’s toes (she was sockless, as it was a lovely 83 degrees). I cringed a little and tried to grin and bear it, all the while thinking, “She puts those toes in her mouth you weirdo! Get your random who-knows-the-last-time-they've-been-washed hands off her!” She went to grab her hand (which is the worst in my opinion as they have a semi-permanent place in her mouth) when I politely scooted off mentioning that yes indeed, she had ticklish toes. Is this a total overreaction? Yes. I realize that soon she will be picking nasty things up off the ground and inserting them all into her mouth, and I need to get used to it, but this really irritates me. A couple of weeks ago at church, Hattie and I stepped out into the foyer when she had decided to chat loudly with Fred (her travel companion and best friend) during the meditation prayer. As soon as I walked out, an usher from the church came up hands everywhere and asked if she could hold her. Um, sure? She proceeded to walk up and down the hall. Okay, you work at a church so I assume your heart is good, but please do not walk more than 3 feet from a new mom holding her most precious cargo. Better yet, go find a kid you know and hold them. I lasted less than 5 minutes until I told her she was fine now and we better head back in. So strange. I know I am a new parent and want to protect Hattie with everything I've got and I have to learn to let that go, but damn its hard! Soon there will be times on the playground when I will feel the need to remind her to ‘be careful’ or ‘watch what you’re doing’ only for it all to fall on deaf ears. I know this, but can’t I hang on just a little while?

Shape? What shape?

It’s Monday. Kinda feels like a Monday. Getting ready to head home and take Hattie on another run. We will see how it goes today. We tried 2 ‘runs’ (I use that term incredibly loosely) last week and she was not a happy camper on them. I think maybe the straps in the jogger rub on her neck. Hopefully with some extra padding she will be a happy companion and, more importantly, a distraction for me. I need something to help me along the way because I am completely, utterly and pathetically out of shape. I am all healed after the surgeries and that is the important part, but man am I in sorry a** shape. Last week I made it all of 2 blocks before stopping in a pant. And my legs and knees were sore the next day. What the hell? I mean I know I've never been a marathoner, but really? Sore after THAT? Oh boy, I am old. I may have to stick with the elliptical and aerobics. And maybe those aerobics you can do sitting down…
To all my girlfriends, it was lovely to see you and your families on Saturday. Fun husbands, beautiful kids and close friends. We are so lucky! Love you all!